Tuesday, November 15, 2016


Within a blink of an eye I'm already almost done with the first semester of my PhD program. Amidst juggling with coursework and lab work, my stressed, sleep-deprived brain promptly decided that it needs to evoke a sense of urgency for me to attend to this neglected web space... good job, slacker.

I figured I haven't really written about my life for a while now, so here go some reminiscences of what happened in the past few months:

JUNE I turned 25. Also got married to Primary. We booked an elopement package that came with one officiant and one professional photographer; the only attendees allowed were our two legal witnesses. The ceremony is non-denominational, vows are the traditional vows. There is no reference to a Higher Power or subservience of one gender over another, and no mention of exclusivity.

At first I strongly opposed to having a wedding reception and was hoping to drag it out at least until 5 years later (we will both have graduated by then), but it didn't take long for the emotional blackmailing from our parents to work wonders... and I gave in. We are flying back to do a wedding reception end of this year. In a way it's good that we I am planning it from opposite side of the planet because not being able to micro-manage every single detail lowers my expectations a lot. Otherwise it is very likely that I will go flow-blown Bridezilla and break down 3582109367 times.

Oh btw, the night before we went to get our marriage license (a week before the registration), I finally went with Primary to meet the polyamory community he had been attending gatherings with. I was reluctant for a very long time because there wasn't a single Asian in the local kink community, also most of them have the typical Midwest physique— what's the point when I already know I wouldn't fuck obese/old people? It was like that when the last time we went to this hotel take-over fetish weekend party on New Year's Eve. Primary took me on the first night and I took Dom on the second night. It was an eye-opener (duh), and I did have fun playing with the bdsm setups and having semi-public sex with Primary and Dom (on respective nights), but on both nights I felt very pressured because I knew that every couple who approached us wanted to have sex with me yet I wasn't interested in any of them. Honestly, the scene of saggy skins and excess fats was a huge turn-off too. Right, experience like this is horizon-expanding, but once was enough?

Primary assured me that this group was different and they were just looking for friendships with people living a similar lifestyle. He was right. The meetup was hosted at a retired professor's house and we had some nice conversations with other folks there over dinner at the back yard by the river. We had to leave before they started playing Kinky Jenga. I told Primary I wouldn't mind going to gatherings like this again.

JULY The same group Primary— uh, perhaps I should start referring to him as Hubs now? Aite. The same group Hubs and I met with was having another gathering. Dom went with us. This time round there were some younger folks, a few wild kids (one was as young as 17 years old, what the hell?). It was rather relaxing: hammock, firework, barbecue, potluck, rope play demo, Kinky Jenga. Everything went quite well except that (1) a drunk stranger showed up out of nowhere, puked all over at the back yard (the guys got him off the property), and (2) the old husband of a goth 22-year-old young mom got too stoned and was behaving like a moron the whole time. Highlight of the night: she squirted breast milk at a 20-year-old chick who was eating her out.

The three of us went to some clubs after the gathering was over. Dom suggested a threesome as our wedding gift, Hubs agreed, so we headed home and I finally had my first MMF threesome (we had orgies together before, but this was the first time with just the three of us). Being ravaged by two men I love felt fantastic, and they admitted that watching me get fucked by the other was a turn-on ;)

AUGUST I took a 2-week break before classes started. The first week was spent with Dom in Chicago. Dom had business conferences to attend so I traveled alone to explore the city a little and visited some museums during the day, then we spent the nights together. I bought a Sex Bomb from Lush and had our first experience with bath bomb in the tub. Sexy time after the bath didn't go well though: lower back pain had already been killing the both of us we had to take pain killer to cope (the hotel bed was terrible), waist movements made the pain so much worse we had to call it quits halfway humping. Bummer. On our last day we were supposed to visit Brookfield Zoo, I was soooo looking forward to it, but we decided to sleep in because of storm warning; woke up to find out it was already sunny, ended up having sex (switched hotel on Friday night, back pain went away a little) and ran out of time to go to the zoo. I know I shouldn't be complaining over this after being pampered with luxurious dinners the past few days but ugh. Dom promised there'll be another Chicago trip this year though!

The second week was spent with Hubs and his family in New York. So so happy that I got to meet up with Rudy and Anna, two of my closest friends I had asked to join my bridal party (Rudy will be, Anna can't make it). Reminisced a lot and was very grateful how far we've come.

SEPTEMBER & OCTOBER Studies, work, finalizing details for upcoming wedding receptions.
2 months went by in a blur. The only highlight was that Hubs, Dom and I had another threesome.

I am very pleased at myself that I no longer obsess over whether Dom is sleeping with other women behind my back. Both of us have been super busy so I doubt that he had/has the time to, but even if he did/does, it doesn't matter to me anymore. It's like I couldn't care less whether Hubs sleeps with another woman, with or without telling me. I have sort of gotten there with Dom.

Some trivial achievements as a mistress in the past few months:
  • Dom came over to fuck me on his marriage anniversary and almost couldn't get hard for her later that night;
  • His wife doesn't know the pass code of his phone but I do— he told me the very same day he got his new phone;
  • I slept over at Dom's a couple times (she was out of town). We fucked on the couch;
  • Dom took leave and we spent the afternoon at the library/Starbucks studying, twice;
  • Dom came over to see me on Freakfest night despite the crazy traffic;
  • We text and talk on the phone every day, spent time together at least twice every week.

Suffice to say, I am very content with my personal life right now.
A hot, intelligent girlfriend would be icing on the cake :P

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