Thursday, February 2, 2017

Prostitute mentality

(Originally written in 2013. Reblogging it here because it's fitting.)

"You know what. I will actually consider sleeping with someone in return of a big favor. Provided that it's a person I don't mind, and don't feel cheapened sleeping with. But even if it's someone I don't feel like sleeping with, as long as the compensation is reasonably huge and there won't be any backlash, I might still consider it."

"I understand the former situation: you get the physical pleasure and perhaps mental satisfaction, and you get something extra out of it, why not? But the latter— "

Well, many women have the prostitute's mentality anyway, only that they don't realize it, or don't admit it. If you ever expect or demand guys to pay for your meals, buy you things, take you on vacations, and genuinely believe that the guy you are dating or sleeping with should pay, be honest, it's because you consciously or subconsciously think that they owe you for the sexual favors you will give or has given them. Think about it. Unless he is financially very well-off compared to you and willingly want to spend to have more luxurious time together, what is so great about you that makes you think that you deserve some monetary incentive for staying in a relationship or in the same bed with him?

Offering someone the privilege to get intimate with you, whether or not in the name of 'relationship', in exchange of materialistic reward or emotional payment for your dignity is a form of (soft) prostitution too. You can get defensive and offer alternative explanations, but that's how I see it.

Of course there exist females who just have sex and leave it at that— those who are really confident, whom I refer to as the "alphas" in the dating scene. A lot of people are depriving themselves of a great deal of good sex, just because they believe their pleasure needs to be approved first, and be compensated later. Truly confident, alpha females behave otherwise: they know there is nothing they should be ashamed of, and do things for the sake of making themselves happy. They don’t need smart-mouthed texts and expensive gifts to prove their self-worth, and don't rely on any silly code of moral behaviors to tell them what will result in the most net gain and what won’t. They lay men just because they can, and want to. 

Technically, free should be worse than cheap isn't it, since expensive is better than cheap. But no, cheap is worse than free, and we now see why it is so.

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